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Jul. 4th, 2007 10:01 pmChrist.
Sammy's locked him in the freaking bathroom--just after he used it, too, dammit.
At least he's got his wallet, and his credit cards. Won't take long to jimmy the lock, get out of here, and beat the pants off his lovesick little brother. He and Kaylee are pretty damn--ah, there the lock goes. Now, to get--
clunk
clunk clunk CLUNK
Well, shit. The clever little fucker's barricaded the door.
clunk clunk clunk CRACK
Okay, breaking the door off its hinges doesn't really seem to--how the hell did he pile everything that high, anyway?
Nevermind. At least this place has a window. Though Mr. Jesus McCavity is really not gonna appreciate the number of repair charges added to his bill. Oh well. That ain't Dean's problem, anyway.
Okay, now. Where to go. Library? Nah, too boring. Back through the front door to use Sammy's laptop? Nah, Sasquatch probably has that freaking password protection on.
That weird little herbal supplement shop? Could be. And what's he got to lose now, anyway?
****
There's chicks inside, some of 'em old, some of 'em young, so Dean puts on his best swagger and steps inside, grinning wide and easy.
"Hey, ladies. Nice night, huh?"
Oooookay, maybe that's not the best approach. And those knitting needles look pretty sharp. Still--
"Uh. Any of you ever heard of crap that's kinda like love juice? My brother's got some--"
Oh man. Old ladies are freaking dangerous. Especially when they mistake you for some kinda kinky sex freak.
"Well, shit."
Okay, now that the herbal shop is out of bounds, maybe . . . maybe . . .
"Young man."
Huh?
"Young man, if you wouldn't mind making your way over here right quick, I might have the answer to your difficulties."
"Huh?"
She looks kinda pissy.
"Well, if you don't--"
"Yeah, yeah, sure. Sorry." He scuffles his boots in the dirt.
"You know that shit?"
Her mouth purses even more. "You watch your mouth, or I'll go right back inside."
He scratches the back of his head, feeling pretty damn awkward.
"Uh. Sure. I mean, yes, ma'am."
"You can call me Mathilda. Mathilda Westbridge." She smiles conspiratorially. "My Frederick used to get dosed all the time with things like that. Young ladies--they seem so unprincipled nowadays, but back when I was young--well." She sniffs. "Girls today don't hold a candle."
Yeah, still awkward.
"Uh. That's . . . that's awful, yeah. But you--you got somethin' I can use on my brother?"
She digs in her pocket, holding out a barely-full perfume vial. It smells like granny's smell.
Dean makes a face, wiping it off and replacing it with a smile the second Mathilda starts to look cranky.
"Can I--I can bring it back after I use it on him. You know, if you still need--"
She just laughs at him.
"Never you mind about that, young man. I've got more where that came from. Eunice still has her eyes on my man, and I intend to keep it from escalating to her hands. Not that Frederick would, but--well. I'm sure you've read your Shakespeare, you must know what I'm talking about."
Dean looks blank.
"Shakespeare. Yeah. I thought it looked kinda funny. Uh. Thanks, ma'am. Mathilda. Really. Thanks a lot."
She goes back inside after he takes the bottle and shoves it in his own pocket.
Now--now he's gotta break back into the hotel room and make it to Milliways. Here's hoping nothing real bad's happened while--
While--
Yeah, while he's been busy.
Sammy's locked him in the freaking bathroom--just after he used it, too, dammit.
At least he's got his wallet, and his credit cards. Won't take long to jimmy the lock, get out of here, and beat the pants off his lovesick little brother. He and Kaylee are pretty damn--ah, there the lock goes. Now, to get--
clunk
clunk clunk CLUNK
Well, shit. The clever little fucker's barricaded the door.
clunk clunk clunk CRACK
Okay, breaking the door off its hinges doesn't really seem to--how the hell did he pile everything that high, anyway?
Nevermind. At least this place has a window. Though Mr. Jesus McCavity is really not gonna appreciate the number of repair charges added to his bill. Oh well. That ain't Dean's problem, anyway.
Okay, now. Where to go. Library? Nah, too boring. Back through the front door to use Sammy's laptop? Nah, Sasquatch probably has that freaking password protection on.
That weird little herbal supplement shop? Could be. And what's he got to lose now, anyway?
****
There's chicks inside, some of 'em old, some of 'em young, so Dean puts on his best swagger and steps inside, grinning wide and easy.
"Hey, ladies. Nice night, huh?"
Oooookay, maybe that's not the best approach. And those knitting needles look pretty sharp. Still--
"Uh. Any of you ever heard of crap that's kinda like love juice? My brother's got some--"
Oh man. Old ladies are freaking dangerous. Especially when they mistake you for some kinda kinky sex freak.
"Well, shit."
Okay, now that the herbal shop is out of bounds, maybe . . . maybe . . .
"Young man."
Huh?
"Young man, if you wouldn't mind making your way over here right quick, I might have the answer to your difficulties."
"Huh?"
She looks kinda pissy.
"Well, if you don't--"
"Yeah, yeah, sure. Sorry." He scuffles his boots in the dirt.
"You know that shit?"
Her mouth purses even more. "You watch your mouth, or I'll go right back inside."
He scratches the back of his head, feeling pretty damn awkward.
"Uh. Sure. I mean, yes, ma'am."
"You can call me Mathilda. Mathilda Westbridge." She smiles conspiratorially. "My Frederick used to get dosed all the time with things like that. Young ladies--they seem so unprincipled nowadays, but back when I was young--well." She sniffs. "Girls today don't hold a candle."
Yeah, still awkward.
"Uh. That's . . . that's awful, yeah. But you--you got somethin' I can use on my brother?"
She digs in her pocket, holding out a barely-full perfume vial. It smells like granny's smell.
Dean makes a face, wiping it off and replacing it with a smile the second Mathilda starts to look cranky.
"Can I--I can bring it back after I use it on him. You know, if you still need--"
She just laughs at him.
"Never you mind about that, young man. I've got more where that came from. Eunice still has her eyes on my man, and I intend to keep it from escalating to her hands. Not that Frederick would, but--well. I'm sure you've read your Shakespeare, you must know what I'm talking about."
Dean looks blank.
"Shakespeare. Yeah. I thought it looked kinda funny. Uh. Thanks, ma'am. Mathilda. Really. Thanks a lot."
She goes back inside after he takes the bottle and shoves it in his own pocket.
Now--now he's gotta break back into the hotel room and make it to Milliways. Here's hoping nothing real bad's happened while--
While--
Yeah, while he's been busy.
